On my way home, I was writing this in my head and I thought I'd say: it's not just that I can't drum up the necessary oomph to write, I can't even muster the determination to have my increasingly reptilian nails seen to by trained professionals. And while I can't qualify pedicures as relaxing, neither can I claim that they require a great deal of exertion on my part.
Then guess what? I narrated myself right to the nail salon. But not before I returned a book to the library. I am a DYNAMO.
As a special reward, the scary pain-inducing lady wasn't even there and now, thanks to the reasonably gentle lady, I write to you with unshameful toenails.
We are drawing another school year to a close, which is pleasant in a way, but also carries with it the stomach-knotting anxiety that is graduation. They are predicting a heat wave for Saturday, which, experience suggests, means that everyone's grandmas will be clamoring for shade under the food-prep canopy and rogue agents will steal whole bottles of water that were meant to serve at least four. It isn't pretty. Please cross your fingers that it turns out to be a pleasant 75 degrees with a light breeze and that people do not feel compelled to linger too long over their cake because, frankly, while we are proud of the Class of 2013, much as we have been proud of every class before them, we, the humble staff, are quite tired and would like to go home.
Aside from a cavalcade of events, the end of the year is punctuated by gift-giving. We are a generous institution. Many, actually most, of these gifts I select myself, which I don't mind. In fact, it is quite a lot of fun to buy presents for people with A) someone else's money, but B) no risk of incarceration. I am also the in-house gift-wrapper, which is as close as I get to crafting. Though I can't sew and tentative forays into paper flower construction and furniture painting have yielded, at best, modest results, I really enjoy wrapping presents. In fact, this is not the time to be humble: I'm good. I look forward to it as a respite from the springtime graduation anxiety, but this year was a veritable onslaught of occasion. This spring, I wrapped 26 presents.
Basically, I am Santa Claus now. Or an elf. No. Santa sounds better.
I will be putting that on my resume.